SweetSpearGirl's Adventures - Chapter 1: Jabbing in Hell

Cast of Characters
- SweetSpearGirl, lvl 60 spearazon with Jab as main skill; using Lycander's Flank
- Debi, Rogue merc, using Cliffkiller
- Slvl 6 Valkyrie with very short life-span


Baal was slain, and far more easily than Diablo. Even the Valk had only gone down once. As SweetSpearGirl and her posse stepped out of Tyrael's portal back into the Rogue camp, she knew that this was the last time she would have to overcome the legions of hell across the lands of Sanctuary.

Stone Ripper

Not that it would be plain sailing, as she soon discovered! Her large amounts of leech were not what they had been and it took a lot longer to kill anything; Corpsefire's gang in the Den of Evil did for her Rogue merc Debi (and hence, also did for 50k of the SpearGirl's gold!), and entering the Cold Plains they ran into *three* bosses. The first - Stone Ripper the Slayer - extra fast, fire enchanted, lightning enchanted - was bad enough, but during *that* fight, Soul Fester the Dark - teleportation, extra fast, fire enchanted - hove into view. Dispatching the vile foes, our heroes were stopped only a handful of steps further on, by Bone Heart - lightning enchanted, fire enchanted, stone skin, immune to physical, immune to lightning - and before that fight was done SweetSpearGirl had used up almost every one of her fat purples and recast the Valk more times than she could count! Bone Heart's drop was singularly unremarkable; a few healing potions and some fancy yellow knife. SweetSpearGirl swore to herself. It had *not* been worth all the rejuvs!

Soul Fester


The crew had noticed by now - well, SweetSpearGirl and Debi had noticed; the Valk was chasing after blades of grass and PI LEs that the others had wisely decided to ignore - that Chance Stones were dropping on a regular basis. Stockpiling them, our heroine began to realize her stash was running out of room! Although with three items of Tal Rasha's set in there, along with a bunch of other rings, ammys and runes, this was not altogether surprising...

By comparison with the bosses in the Cold Plains, Blood Raven was easy-peasy japaneesy - she went down after just a few hits and dropped yet *another* chance stone - along with some fancy yellow dagger and a pile of gold. "Onward and upward!" SweetSpearGirl yelled; Debi rolled her eyes at her employer's enthusiasm and the Valk - stuck and vibrating against a stone wall near the Stony Field entrance - did nothing. As usual.

In the Stony Field, the boss situation was little better. Bane Maggot - a boss Foul Crow who was extra fast, stone skin, immune to physical and sporting a holy shock aura - flittered in, deftly avoiding and shocking SweetSpearGirl and the Valk as they struggled to get rid of it. At the same time they were swarmed by goat boys, led by Foul Froth the Slasher - extra strong, mana burn, fire enchanted! SweetSpearGirl did *not* like mana burners; she had no mana leech and had already begun to notice its absence when battling the PIs. Muttering rudely, she grimly pressed home her attacks, taking out Foul Froth the Dumbass first, then going after Bane Maggot. Who led the intrepid trio straight into the grasp of Sharp Head The Hungry - "Slap Head the Hungry", Debi christened him - a cold enchanted, extra strong skeleton blessed with a conviction aura!! The nasty swirly green aura wrapped itself around SweetSpearGirl's feet and those of her faithful merc, while the Valk ignored her own green swirl and blindly plunged into the middle of Slap Head's pack. And died.

Bane Maggot... lovely   Foul Froth the Dumbass

At about this time, Bane Maggot bit the dust, and our zon found herself backpedalling towards the waypoint in order to reach Akara and replenish her all-but-vanished mana reserves. Life leech was not a problem, at least against non-PIs, but on the way back to the waypoint they ran through a camp of Fallen and had to stop to fend off fireballs and the mindless attacks of nasty little red goblins!

This was when Rot Eater made her appearance. A corrupted rogue archer blessed with yet another Holy Shock aura, she also sported stone skin and multiple shot, and was thus PI...

Friggin PIs!

Slap Head!

SweetSpearGirl had had enough. She downed one of her last fat purples, reconjoured her Personal Heavenly Companion - who didn't last long - smashed her way through Slap Head and his pack, and made a run for it...

On returning through her town portal, she pointedly ignored Rot Eater and went straight for the Underground Passage. There were a few bosses down there including one PI, but with no especially nasty mods otherwise, they soon battled their way through. In the Dark Wood, SweetSpearGirl levelled to 61. Treewood Headfist wasn't a problem, despite the LE thorn beast lurking nearby, and after obtaining the Scrool of Inwossname the trio headed off back to the Stony Field.

Of course, Rakanishu - the lively LE Carver guarding the Cairn Stones - was a PI...

PI Rak. Arse!

"Screw this," SweetSpearGirl muttered, tapping the stones in the correct order as her merc spitted Rak's minions full of arrows. Tristram! At last!

Deckard Cain awaited them; Akara's ring was predictably nondescript, and with this, the spearmaiden and her bow-wielding companion decided not to resummon the Valk, and took a rest instead.

Later on, they ventured into the Black Marsh just far enough to find the Tower and the waypoint, and along the way discovered a Thundergod's Vigour and an Extra Strong MSLE... but that's another story.

[ADDENDUM: SweetSpearGirl completed the remainder of Act 1 and the first part of Act 2 without anything of significance happening, except for the aforementioned MSLEB. The story picks up again in the Far Oasis.]

a howler? Scary!

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